Other Places

I posted at two different blogs. I'm discusssing the blend of magic and history over at Ainsley Park the "Traitor to the Crown" series by C. C. Finlay. I also started a new blog which is more of a "mommy" blog. I like to share things about my kids, but I don't like sharing about them on this blog because, well, its mine and its about me and my writing. So I started Confessions of a Deranged Soccer Mom to discuss my kids and life as a parent.

Oh, How I Miss It!

My WIP languishes on my hard drive, ignored in favor of the business of the holidays. I yearn to lose myself in the world I created, to once again involve myself into the lives of the characters I've created. It seems odd in some ways because the book I'm working on is not full of cheer. I'm not writing a passionate love story or a screwball comedy. The world I created in my book is dark and full of challenges, where the characters are constantly put through trials which should sink any mortal. I miss it.

It really doesn't matter what the subject material is, only that I've created it. No one makes a move unless I say so. I am in command. This time of year, I am carried away by the tide of reality, hanging on as best I can. The holidays are a frenzied time of year and it isn't necessarily a bad situation. It does remind me of what is really important. As much as I am a writer, my role as mother takes precedence. I enjoy it, but it keeps me in a constant spin. Even if I had the block of time to write, my head is buzzing with so many other things, I'm not going to get much done.

Being a writer isn't a static condition. We constantly evolve, learning more about ourselves and our writing behaviors as we go along. I think we often fear we possess only a finite well of creativity which will fade away if we don't nurture it. Last year I think I would be gnashing my teeth, terrified the desire, will and ability to write would disappear because I chose to bake cookies instead of doing a set number of pages. As I discovered, it doesn't. This year, I realize there are so many other joys to experience which I believe will help my writing in the end. I'm enjoying the thrill of watching my daughter play soccer and basketball. I'm enjoying the fun of dragging my son out at 4 a.m. to go Christmas shopping. I'm enjoying the delight of helping my other daughter bake gingerbread cookies. Not all of it is fun, I will say. The obligations I have with regards to my kids activities can be aggravating, but they are important, just as important as my writing is at this point. I'm under enough tension as it is, adding the guilt of not writing is one I don't need to indulge in. My book will be there after the holidays and I won't be under nearly so much stress. I will enjoy the moment when I can sit down and truly write again. It gives me something to look forwards to.

NaNoWriMo: Down the Drain....

Last week ended my dreams of a NaNo win. Disheartening, but stuff happens.

The problem with being a writer, a mother and a wife is that the priorities are constantly changing. It is something I accept and unfortunately writing often falls into third place. It doesn't depress me, I'm realistic. When I married and had children, I was joining into something else, into a unit which takes precedence over my individual wants and needs. Writing is a personal thing for me, it is something I do for myself. No one else in the family understands what it means although they try to support me where they can. But not at the expense of the family.

I know it sounds bad, I find writers very protective of their writing and believe it should take priority over other things. I think that works for some people. It never has for me. My own personality contributes to this. I can't write in chaos thus my house has to be clean. I have children in too many activities and I insist in participating in them. If I'm going to commit myself to such, then I have to be prepared to put my writing aside.

And yet, I still see plenty of opportunities I had to write. I still need to be more productive with my time. I get distracted. There were plenty of moments where I could have pounded out a few hundred words. But I just didn't want to. With two birthdays to celebrate, three soccer practices, a baseball practice, laying sod in the yard, Cotillion, soccer games, baseball games, a baseball party and a birthday party to organize all in one week, I found it hard to concentrate.

But that wasn't the kicker. Losing power for 24 hours was what finally did me in. Tuesday night I had plans. I'd spent all day running errands and preparing for the week. My husband had a meeting that night so I knew I'd get two solid hours of writing time. Things were smooth. Until the lights flared in my house then went out completely. A transformer blew on the poll outside my house leaving me and two other houses without power. The electric company was out all night getting it fixed. The surge screwed up the main switch to my house so I had to get that repaired before the power would come back on. It put me so far behind and I couldn't write (no, I don't hand write, I'm too slow). So I give. I'm going to keep writing this week and see how much I can get, but Thanksgiving is this week and I'm hosting so I'm going to have to work on that.

Anyway, I wish the best to the other NaNos and hope they all get their 50K in. Its quite the accomplishment and I'm cheering you all on.

Tough Going

Ugh...I didn't think it would be this hard.

My word counts aren't what I'd like them to be. It isn't my WIP's fault, I'm in a meaty part of the story where the words should flow easily. It isn't a lack of time. I've had plenty of time to get writing done. I have made the mistake of saving some of it for evening and have been too tired to pick it back up.

Mostly its focus. My daughter has been sick and spent the first four days of the week at home. She finally went to school today. She isn't a bad kid, but she was restless. And knowing she was in the house interfered with my plan as it were. I'm not sure why, but just having another presence in the house was distracting.

In truth, I'm a little slow out of the gate anyway. My big word weeks are usually the last two of the month. But still, I had a plan and I'm unhappy that my plan is going the way I want.

But we adapt and I haven't given up. Just wish something would kick me and get me going.

Happy November!!

Today begins the madness that is National Novel Writing Month. Writers everywhere are feverishly pounding out words as fast as they can in an attempt to write 50,000 words before the end of the month. It averages to about 1667 words per day. I've set a goal of 1800 words a day. My plan is to do three sessions a day at 600 words per session. As I've said previously, my life is too hectic to sit and write in one sitting. Plus, I get antsy.

Every NaNo participant has their own game plan. They all have their own motivations they call upon to help them through. I've done this a couple of times although I've only won once. And each time is different. There are a couple of things I've found which help me succeed.

For me, I cannot start a new project. I have to be knee deep in a project in order to get the acceleration it is going to take to get the writing done. Too often, those first 5000 words are slow and difficult. I've started a book from the beginning for NaNo before and I ended up stopping midway through the month. The MS I've chosen to work on was at the 40K mark on October 31st, I'm hoping this month will get me to the end.

I think that's another thing which works for me. I don't want a mere 50K words, I want the end of the book. If I finish this book at the end of November, I have the holidays to clean it up and have it ready to submit. It's a great movitator.

I also plan rewards. If I get my 1800 words done, I have the freedom to do whatever else I want. Usually that is mindnumbing video games. I'm lucky that most of my shows are on hiatus for the first couple of weeks of the month so I'm not so tempted watch t.v.

Reading is a big part of my NaNo regimen. I need to find time to read. I'm not sure why. Perhaps reading reminds me of the final product. It reminds me why I have joined the madness.

Mostly I strive to make this month about the joy of writing. I'm trying to make writing an integrated part of my life rather than a seperate situation. I want to give it the same importance I give everything else.

Those of you who do NaNo or any other time of challenge-based writing project, what do you hope to gain from the exercise?

Crazy November

Next month is probably the craziest month of my year. There's Thanksgiving, both of my daughters' birthdays, the end of soccer season for one girl (which means a party), the end of baseball season (which doesn't really have a party but we tend to do something informal) and the beginning of basketball season for my older daughter. Plus there are a couple of big school functions and the usual things like homework and projects to go along with it. And then there's NaNo. National Novel Writing Month is an event which runs the entire month of November where writers try to write 50,000 words in thirty days. It gets insane. All levels of writers participate and I know a bunch of you are religious about the experience. I've done it a couple of times, I won in '06. It was the only time I have won and I think I understand why.

So I'm sure some of you are wondering why and how I'm going to do this. As to the why, I have several reasons and not all of them are writing related. First, I want to get this book done. My prediction is that I will hit at least 40K by the end of October on my WIP. If I'm focused, I should be able to finish it in November. Second, I give myself permission to put my writing top in my attention. And third, because of how hectic my November is, I need the escape of my writing. I'm not one to relax in a bathtub or take a "me" day. My novel is where I find my vacation. But NaNo requires a commitment of about 1500 words a day which is less than relaxing. So I have to plan it.

I created a November binder. I printed out calendar pages for each day of the month and put them in my binder. I've got a pad of sticky notes and a pencil ready to jot down any notes I need. Next week I'll go through and write in the times I have obligations and work around there for everything else. It means I need to schedule my writing. I need to be able to look at a day and find the time I'm going to write and make that a commitment.

I also decided I need to make time for exercise. Honestly, I don't like working out. I'll do it because I find my brain works better if I've got my blood pumping. Also, I'll have a boatload of Halloween candy around me so I'll need to work it off.

I have the advantage in that I'm a stay-at-home. Its also a disadvantage because I have a hard time saying the word "no" when asked to help. Did I mention I'm also the chairman of the food committee for the 8th grade party this year?

Are any of you planning on doing NaNo? If you are, have you mapped out any strategies to help you succeed in your goal? I'm organizing a small group of fellow mom-writers who want to do NaNo so I'm hoping that will help keep me motivated. I'm thinking of finding a reward for myself. I think I bought myself a video game when I won last year. Any thoughts? Oh, and my NaNo handle is Renered1 if you want to buddy me.

The Darker the Better

I’m not a cruel person although I’m sure my children would disagree.  But I adore nothing more than torturing my characters.  I kick them when they are down.  My heroine in my current WIP has been through hell.  Her life is in shambles.  So now its time to kick her in the ribs.  And I smile as I do it.

Am I sadistic?  Not really.  But tough situations show off the mettle of a character.  If your character can live through the difficulties you throw at them, then they are well-drawn. 

Its a good test of your characterization.  If you can put your character in an impossible situation and write them back out, the character is solid.  I find writers tend to back off when the going is really bad and let off the suffering.  I think it relates to a fear of what the character might do and how much it will change them.  I just finished a book this morning where nothing really bad happened.  At the end the heroine was kidnapped and nearly raped.  Well, not really, because the hero’s brother was right there to rescue her.  Would this situation do anything to disrupt the relationship? Nope.  And at this point, the hero and heroine were already engaged.  Would the heroine  be so traumatized by her experience it would cause her to withdraw from her lover?  Nah.  Would the hero be so disheartened because he was unable to protect the heroine he would pull away?  Of course not.  After a lovey dovey scene, things were alright.  How boring. 

I like my characters to pull themselves out, to find wells of strength they never knew they had.  Black moments are the best way to do it.  These horrendous situations strengthen characters, add dimension and give the writer more to work with, making the story more compelling.  I think sometimes writers don’t want to go down the path of cruelty for fear of what they may find within themselves.  How can a person create such vicious and cruel situations and not be unscathed themselves?  Or maybe the situation will make the character do something sinister to survive.  I think sometimes writers shy away from scenes that may require their hero or heroine to do something wicked. 

I finished another book where the hero is constantly thrown into horrible situations with no foreseeable way out.  And yes, he does end up doing things which are not nice.  And yes, it does change his character, but it makes him more compelling and more sympathetic.

Black moments both physical and emotional are chances for a writer to shine.  They are tough, require focus but are, in the end, rewarding and add depth.  Embrace the darkness.  You’ll be happy you did.