Family of Five Drowns in Ocean of Magazines

Some people collect stamps. Others, coins. Dolls, butterflies, plates are all common collectibles. But not me. No, my family and I seem to collect magazines. Here is a list of mine that I get every month:

RWR
Cooks Illustrated
Martha Stewart's Living
Martha Stewart's Kids (that only comes out 4 times a year)
Martha Stewart's Everyday Food
Cooking Light
Hollywood Life
Entertainment Weekly

I occasionally pick up "Sunset." At Thanksgiving and Christmas time I pick up all the granny magazines like "Good Housekeeping," "Family Circle" and whatever else is out there. Hubby is bad too. He gets at least 4 different car magazines. My son gets a couple of magazines as well. Problem is, I don't read or look at them. Then they start encroaching on our living space. I need to make it a habit when I sit down and watch t.v. to sit and go through the darn things. I end up with piles of torn out magazine pages, but I can throw them in a box and hide them in a closet like the monsters they are. Hubby's are even worse. Typical man, he reads them in the bathroom. You have to fight your way to the shower.

Am I the only magazine fiend? What magazines do you get?

Haloscan Trouble

Is anyone else having problems posting to my blog? A couple of people have mentioned they can't open the comments section.

Oh, one more thing....

For the Paul Anka fans out there, I saw this. I can download it from iTunes for $10, I might have to do that.

She Can Blame Suzanne

Today Suzanne talked about how she forced her children to clean house. I admit, the idea enchanted me. So I gave my fiver year old daughter a rag and some all purpose cleaner and sent her to work on the coffee tables and end tables. Having done that, she moved on to the dining room table and all the chairs. And her reward for all this hard work? I let her cut out my coupons. I hate cutting coupons more than anything but the darling girl has almost a pathological obsession with cutting stuff up. So she was happy, particularly when she found the Chuck E. Cheese coupons.

By the way, I dyed her hair again: Red Copper spirits. It looks awesome, people keep asking if its natural. I also put the dye on the two year old's head. She is a blonde so it makes her look like a fireball. She loves it. I'll post pictures later. They look really cute.

The Demon of Self-Doubt

The incubus itself crouched on my chest last night, its weight pressing all of my confidence out of me. I received a rejection letter last night that left me devastated. I won't go into the specifics, just that it was a bad one, my first.

The demon is one of my own making. I've been rejected before and will no doubt get rejected again. For the most part, the rejections have been encouraging. But this one was vile. So what do I do? I ignore all of the good things that I've received about writing, all of the positive comments and focus on this one crummy rejection.

No one can make us unhappy unless we let them, no one can shake our resolve unless we let them. And I let this one person make me question my talent and my ability to write.

Luckily, I've been through this before and I can get myself through it. The positive is it makes me really look at my writing and decide why I am doing this. I get upset enough that I want to focus on my writing and damn the market place and the movers and shakers of such.

My point is to those who are new to submitting, it will get ugly, but you have to decide how much you are going to let it shake you. How badly do you want to write? Go ahead and throw yourself a pity party, mine consisted of two Tecates, a glass of wine and numerous Reese's peanutbutter eggs I found leftover from Easter. But realize the only one that can make you quit is yourself. If you let anyone else dictate your desire to write and your drive to accomplish publication, you have no one else to blame.

The Whining-Writing Connection

I realized after all my whining this week about not being able to write and how rotten my kids are and how I want to quit, I've managed to write about 3K words. I would probably have gotten more done but I had to research Palladian architecture. For those interested, I've got some nice Georgian architecture links I'll post over at the "Age" blog later today.

So I wonder what magic whining does to get me to write?

I'm playing with Haloscan. Suzanne mentioned over on Kacey's blog about it, so I'm giving it a try.

World in My iPod

Suzanne talked about her favorite room in her house today on her blog. I have a favorite room, but my opportunities to escape there are few. But I do have my iPod.

I love this thing. The sound quality is so wonderful and it is so easy to carry, it makes listening to music so much more accessible. Quite often, it is my only escape during the day. I plug myself in and tune out everything else. I work on my dishes, fold laundry, mop floors, any number of household chores with my earphones on. Usually I am somewhere else in my head, the music effectively blocking out the world. My thoughts usually dwell on my WIP. Unless its Gwen Stefani playing, then I stop and start singing. It's ugly and the children run crying for their rooms. But for the most part, the music carries me to someplace else.

I have 368 songs on my iPod right now. The artists range from Guns n Roses to Joan Baez, k.d. Lang to Enya, usually I can find something to fit my mood.

No, my escapes aren't temporal, but I think the beauty of being a writer is the ability to use the mind to create a world within. We always have a favorite "room" within our heads.

The Long and Winding Road

So Kelly and Kacey have started the "writer's journey" blogfest.

I'm not sure there is anything a writer likes more than to talk about how they're own journey began or where it is leading. We do so love to talk about our writing. And I am absolutely no exception.

I didn't seriously start writing until 2001. Suddenly I felt the bug as it were. I went to about.com's romance writing site (it wasn't "about.com" then, I can't remember what it was called) where I got my first cp who is now author Lydia Joyce. She really kicked me from amateur hour to taking my writing seriously and working hard on it. Then I discovered Romance Central and got involved in the forums where I am still active and I met Melissa. The webmistress, Becky Vinyard has been an amazing font of wisdom and support, encouraging me when I wanted to quit. I also joined RWA. I love my local chapter (OCC/RWA)and my online (KOD). I love the blogging community.

Right now, I feel like I'm a difficult spot professionally. I've got an ms that I've been querying for over a year. It keeps getting requests and I'm still submitting. I've really only queried about 25 different agencies, pretty small number considering. In the meantime, I've kept writing and now have another finished book and am 1/4 of the way through another.

The other challenge is the homefront. Trying to balance writing with being a mother, wife, soccer coach, baseball coach and all the other stuff that fills the life of a SAHM suburbanite can be frustrating. I did dump the coaching duties. You think romance writing is a challenge? Try dealing with the BoD of your local AYSO region.

Sometimes I quit. Like a diehard smoker, I swear I'm never going to write again. I'm going to be a reader and that's it. The longest I've gone without writing in the last 4 years is about 2 weeks. It is a compulsion I cannot stop. I can't imagine that I will ever quit, as long as the characters in my head are trying to escape.

Diet Coke

I love Diet Coke. It is my drink of choice. It beats our wine, beer and sometimes martinis. But Coca Cola has been doing some funky things lately. First, I accidentally bought Coke Zero. YUK! It was terrible. It tasted like regular Coke which I do not like. Then I tried Diet Coke with Splenda. Blech, that stuff was nasty. I am a purist. I do not like Diet Coke with Lime, Lemon, or (shudder, shudder) vanilla. Occasionally, when I am feeling exotic, I will drink Diet Cherry Coke.

However, all of the above are better than Pepsi. I'd rather drink hamster urine than Pepsi (although I'm not sure they aren't the same thing).

So what about you? Are you persnickety when it comes to soda? Are you a Coke drinker or firmly in the Pepsi camp? Is there anything worse than vanilla cherry Dr. Pepper?

Sibling Rivalry

My children have spent the entire summer fighting. All day long it is a litany of complaints and demands. I'm real tired of it. But the sibling they seem to have the most trouble with is the one on my PC.

It never fails, as soon as I sit down to write, they pop up like rapid prairie dogs, tattling or asking for something. My five year old, seeing me with my eyes glued to the screen, will start up a conversation about totally inane things with the only goal being to distract me. My son will come down and ask me how to play a certain computer game or tattle on his sister. The two year old is more insistent. She climbs on my chair and clings to my throat.

Why are they so jealous of the time I spend on my WIP? They don't bother me if I'm doing something else on the PC, but it seems like they have a sense when I'm writing. Perhaps it is my beleaguered imagination, but I don't think they like the idea mommy has something of her own that does not center around them. My husband has said he doesn't like me to write at night when he is home. I can live with that. But my kids do not have that say in my life. I'm hoping as they get older they understand.

I think being a stay-at-home mom has created a situation. They have me here 24/7 and being the centers of the universe they are, they honestly see me as their private property. They own me like they own their toys or anything else. In their mind, my life should revolve around them. Do they ever grow out of this?

Okay, So They Both Wear Weird Gloves

Thanks toSuzanne and Tori for putting a damper in my day, I had to investigate this nefarious "Johnny does Michael as Willy" accusation. Apparently this is a widespread concept. I didn't see the connection myself, but I'm a little biased when it comes to Johnny. Anyway, MSNBC thought it merited a story so here is the link: Depp surprised by Jackson comparisons.

Charlie and the Chocolate Factory

Yesterday I took a second out on the house and packed the kiddies up for the movies. It cost $20 for three of us to get into a matinee! It was another $20 at the snack bar. Ah well....

The movie was great. It is nothing like the Gene Wilder film. I'm not saying it is better or worse, just different. Of course, I grew up on the original so it has special meaning to me. But the new one with Johnny Depp....excuse me, I'm having a Johnny moment. I have a lot of these. Anyway, Johnny...man, there I go again...is very good. He does "oddball" so well. Freddy Highmore, the boy who plays Charlie, is soooo cute. I want to adopt him. It is definitely a Tim Burton film, so it has a dark feel to it, but my kids got a real kick out of it. The sets are cool and Johnny...sigh...does such a good job of being weird and childlike at the same time. I will definitely be picking this up on DVD when it comes out. My 5 year old daughter has decided she wants to be Veruca Salt. Hmmmm......


Other things of note...
I posted an article I wrote about the joy of writing a query letter over on the Villa in Tuscany blog. So if you are looking for yet another query letter writing article, there you go.

Another Controversy

The hot stuff I found while blogging today was the whole RITA/GH ceremony fiasco. I wasn't there, so I don't feel I can comment either way with regards to the appropriateness of the program. But hoohaa it has unleashed has certainly been interesting. Having a "National Enquirer" mentality, I've scanned through the various blogs ad nauseum getting little else done.

And that is my concern. Every year it seems RWA has a controversy that THREATENS TO TEAR APART THE ORGANIZATION. It never does. We get through the latest fiasco and things move on. But they do not move forward.

We are an organization of what, 9200 members? That's a sizable group. Our genre has over a billion dollars in sales every year. We are the big chicks on campus. We want respect. We want to be considered serious writers. How serious can we be taken when our infighting is so publicly displayed? When Nora Roberts says she considered resigning from the organization and makes it public, what does that say about us?

Besides being embarrassing, the internal battles are non-productive. While the board and the membership are arguing back and forth on what should be on the cover of a book, we have authors suffering severe financial crushes because they are uninsured and have life-threatening illnesses. While everyone is screaming up and down about the definition of romance, an unpubbed author is having her dreams destroyed by a huckster posing as a legitimate publisher or agent. We as an organization have real power and we are wasting it on inane squabbles that eventually go away, leaving people bitter but no better off.

I blame myself. No, I didn't come up with the Tiananmen Square/"Don't Worry, Be Happy" montage. I didn't vote. I got my ballot, put it aside and completely forgot about it. I did not take it seriously enough to devote 15-20 minutes to read through the candidates and make a decision. I can hardly complain about the current board since I didn't exercise my right to vote and decide who should be there. This has been a lesson learned and I will most definitely pay attention when elections roll around again.

Six Feet Under

Okay, I was going to blog about other stuff, but last night's episode blew me away. I remember when I started watching the show, the first two seasons were amazing. As a writer, I truly appreciated their no-holds-barred approach to conflict between their characters. The last couple of seasons have been kind of dull and less than brilliant, but this season has really been wonderful. Last night was awesome and the makers of the show truly showed no fear in the conflicts and story lines. I don't want to say too much in case there are those who haven't seen it yet. I'm going to miss the show when it is gone. But "Rome" is coming this month and it looks pretty gritty, so I will at least have that to watch.

Lost in the Valley and Other Unpleasant Things

My husband has a Ford Taurus SHO. It is basically a supped up Taurus with a special engine. Ford only made a few of them and we, lucky souls, have one. Anyway, there is a problem with the cams where if they aren't fixed, the motor will blow up. Ford refuses to recognize the problem so owners are forced to find mechanics who specialize in the repair. Yeah, yeah, this is boring but there is a point. One of these magic men lives in the San Fernando Valley, about an hour from my house. So we packed up the tribe and took his car out there. He wrote down the directions and I made a copy. Stupidly, I did not ask him to clarify his directions. So off we go on the myriad of freeways to get to this guy's house. I misread the directions and took a different freeway. I ended up going 14 miles out of my way. What's worse is the freeway I was on was jammed and I wasn't moving. The kids were okay, I've got a dvd player in the car. I figured I was lost and called hubby. He didn't answer. Here is what makes me the total idiot: since I was at a standstill, I decided to...put the address in my GPS system. Golly, seems I really was lost. Yes, I have a GPS and didn't use it. DUH!!!

Finally got my self headed in the right direction. Hubby calls, he forgot to take the phone out of his car and keep it in his pocket while he was busy talking cars with fellow car dudes. After this whole fiasco, we decided to go out to lunch. My son thinks Denny's is haute cuisine so we go there and have the waitress who speaks no English and messes up the order. I'm finally home but I have a trip to Costco planned with the three kids in tow. I'm a glutton for punishment.

Writing is going well, I am up to 20K words on my WIP, but I have discovered why we always have maids and footmen in romance novels. I spent a chunk of the day researching water systems in 18th century London. It would have been much easier to have just ordered the servant to bring it up and not worried about it. But I get a bug in my brain and I can't let it go. I did figure out the wealthy of London all had water piped into their homes, but from there I couldn't figure out what else happened. Did she pump it with a pump? Did she turn the knob on her Delta nickel-plated faucet? I am still unsure. However, there seems to be an obsession with toilets and sewage amongst scholars. I learned far more than I would have liked about 18th century cesspits. I don't know about you, but my romantic novel characters don't need to go to the bathroom. Bathrooms are there so they can have sex in the shower or look in the mirror.

Some Progress

I got three pages written yesterday which wasn't nearly as much as I'd hoped for. Historicals go so much slower for me. Not only does the research cause me to pause, but I also need to choose my words more carefully to avoid anachronisms. I must say, however, writing about the 18th century is easier than writing about the Regency period. For me, the language of a Regency novel is so important. By the time Britain hits the Regency era, there is a lot more enchantment with language. The literacy rate had climbed and people had more leisure time to indulge in the niceties. When I write Regency era, I focus on the words and the rhythm of the sentences, trying to give it more of a feel of the era. In an 18th century story, the language isn't as big of a focus, at least from my point of view. The social structure is different and the upper class was still growing. I'm more interested in the "wildness" of the times.

I'm hoping to get some more writing done today. I've got a big scene coming up and I can't wait to write it. Hope everyone else sees some progress today.

Who should be the next Bond?

Clive Owen

Here is my vote. I really think he's swell. I sat through "King Arthur" just to watch him. Oh, okay, I wanted to watch Ioan Gruffudd too. I spent more time than I should have thinking about Clive Owen than working on my WIP today. But maybe it is because my hero reminds me of Mr. Owen. Hmmm.....

Yeah, I didn't get much done on the writing front today. I did a little research. My problem was how to end this particular chapter. I am all for kicking my heroine when she's down and figured out how to do it in the car today dropping off my kids. Then I got home and got busy doing other stuff (and thinking about Clive Owen).

In the "Good Things" category, I entered the Romance Junkies contest and my entry is up this week. I received two emails from readers last night complimenting me. I got fan mail. Maybe I should frame it.

My kids are at science camp tomorrow morning and my folks are picking my baby up to take her shopping at the
The Container Store with them, so I figure I'll have a couple of hours of peace to work on my WIP.

Missing the Big Dance

Feeling like Cinderella here. All the cool kids get to go the RWA conference this week and are no doubt going to have a blast. Sigh....those of us who aren't going, feel free to indulge in self-pity. Eat that piece of chocolate, take seconds on the pie.

Then get over it.

As Suzanne discussed in her column at RTB, it is a good time to write. So, that's what I'm going to do. I'm going to treat this week like a BIAW and pour my disappointment at not going into a steaming hot flood of creativity.

And dream of Atlanta next year....

Breaking My Cardinal Rule

One reason I write romance is because of the chance it offers to sweep me away from the drudgery of my daily life to a world of glamour, adventure, beauty and...NO CHILDREN. My one rule to my writing, no matter what the genre, is the exclusion of children. People just emerge on the scene fully formed and attractive at age 21.

Sigh...My new WIP requires the heroine to do something she would otherwise never do. A woman will sacrifice all for her children, so I had to write a couple of them in. Those of you with children know we end up sacrificing big and little things in the name of motherhood. And why, I ask? Because they appreciate it?

I think biology does something to us. Maybe the placenta releases a self-sacrificing hormone into our bodies that makes us do bonehead things to make our children happy. How many times have you skipped a show you wanted to watch because the crumb crusher wanted to watch "Teletubbies?" Are you driving your dream car? I kind of doubt when we were 16 we dreamed of driving a big SUV or Dodge Caravan. Heck, with what I paid for my Expedition, I could have gotten a Jag "S" Class. Shall we get into our writing and how family life has affected our writing? Too depressing to think about?

So I shall see how this kid thing pans out in my book. Shudder, shudder.


Bears...

Jill Shalvis isn't the only one with a bear story. The following appeared in my very local paper:

In this heat wave, everyone needs a little cooling off. For a couple of bears spotted recently in north Claremont near Blasidell Ranch, a refreshing dip in the pool is just the thing to bring the temperature down. Lt. Van Horn reports that some bears have been seen ambling into residents' backyards, taking a swim in the pool, and then moving on to the next neighbor's pool.

"We're just waiting for someone to call us because he's sitting in a Jacuzzi, drinking a beer," said Lt. Van Horn

The neighborhood they are talking about is half a mile from my house. I do not have a pool, but I do have a Jacuzzi and beer.

There is Hope for Him Yet

My son has on his screen saver "Super Nerds Only." My son is a geek, a nerd, etc., etc. and is very proud of the fact. He just finished the third grade and had a whole year of perfect report cards. His favorite part of the school year is when they have to do standardized testing. He wears glasses and has asthma. His fashion sense is non-existent. Classic nerd.

Maybe he is on to something. Is it hip to be square?

I saw a story in the paper yesterday which indicates he may be the future style-meister of his generation, Chic to be Geek. Could we be entering an era where brains and talent are valued over beauty and brawn? Instead of being a stupid movie, was "Revenge of the Nerds" a prophetic piece of cinema? Will cheerleaders fight to go out with the president of the chess club? Will boys be more interested in a girl's SAT scores than her bra size? It boggles the mind.

A Blessing and a Curse

When I start writing something that clicks with me, I go into a groove. It consumes me, fills my thoughts, dominates my life. I'm going through it right now. The historical I'm working on is flowing with incredible ease. So I should just ride the wave, right?

Problem is I've got this whole "family" thing going. I have a house and 3 kids requiring my attention. The ms on my screen calls to me constantly and I find myself thinking about it all the time. I'm paying for it this morning as I run into messes the kids made while I wasn't paying attention. Also, my back is in agony from sitting in a chair for so long.

The beauty of my "groove" is the value of the writing. I find the quality is far superior to a book I've "scheduled" myself to write. I can see the difference in the flow and its obvious it is a book from my heart.

So, the family will be neglected somewhat for the next couple of months while I work on this book. Hopefully they won't burn the house down.

And, taking a ride on my roller coaster writing career....

I got a request for a full Friday night. I need to steal a ream of paper from dh's office tomorrow and print it out.

But What ELSE Do You Do?

I went to a cocktail party last night. It was held at a hotel which overlooks the ocean and had all the food and alcohol one could hope for. These events are always awkward for me. I love the food and the drinks, but I feel uncomfortable in these situations. First, I'm only 5'3" and I get pushed in crowds. I can't see and I have a difficult time maneuvering around the masses (there were probably 300 people in attendance). After being home in semi-isolation for the last 3 1/2 years, I've lost my poise amongst people. I have no idea what to wear or what to talk about.

This event is particularly discomfiting. Everyone there is involved in real estate in some form or another. Everything is about the deal. When someone meets you, they are judging whether they can use you to get ahead. Upon realizing I'm not a member of the industry, they quickly exit. Its not necessarily a bad thing because these people tend to be interested in one thing: money.

At one point in the evening I sat down with a piece of cheesecake at one of the cute little tables surrounding the fountains. My husband deserted me to talk business with a client. A woman sat down at the table and asked me who I worked for. When I explained I was a SAHM, she asked me what else did I do. Certainly I must do something else. I was a little shocked. You mean being a mom to 3 kids and taking care of a house isn't enough? I suppose I could have said I was a struggling writer and talked about my writing, but I really didn't want to. I know when I've talked about my writing before, I've seen eyes glaze over in boredom.

It is amazing how low down on the social food chain stay-at-home-moms are. What a wake up call.

Well, the food was good and the drinks free, so I'm not one to get too worked up. I did learn some lessons. Women who are 45 really shouldn't shop in the Jr.'s section, they look ridiculous. Too much sun makes a woman look like shoe leather. If it weren't for cell phones, some people wouldn't know how to talk.

Oh, I wanted to add...

In relation to my post about losing and finding my writing mojo (thank you ladies for all of your good thoughts), I saw this post by Olivia and thought she more eloquently said what I was feeling.