My RWA chapter is sponsoring a contest. East Valley Authors is holding its first annual query contest. I know many of you are preparing your query letters for agents so this might be a good opportunity for you. This contest is not restricted to romance. Genre is not a consideration, it simply needs to be fiction. First round will be judged by PRO & published writers. Yours truly is taking the lead on judging. The final round is being judged by Kevan Anne Lyon and Jill Marsal of the Sandra Dijkstra Agency. The entry fee is only $5 so it's not a bad deal. You can find details over at East Valley Authors website.
Other stuff....
My hubby had his wisdom teeth out this morning. It went fine but DH has be dreading this forever. The thought of being put under made him nervous. I was very impressed with the oral surgeon and his staff. They were wonderful and in fact called this afternoon to check on him. I'm hoping he heals well, I got dry socket when I had mine out and I was miserable for over a week. He seems to be doing better than I did however. My mom took the kids for the last couple of days so that has been helpful.
So is anyone else expecting a package from Amazon tomorrow?
Friday, July 20, 2007
Wednesday, July 18, 2007
Some of these are brick and mortar, others are online.
1. Target. I love Target. My week isn't complete unless I've gone there at least once. I look for their ad on Sunday like some men look for their "Playboys."
2. Wal-Mart. Actually, I have a love/hate relationship with WallyWorld. I don't care for the store but I love their prices. Rarely do I go in there when I can't find something I need. My local Wal-Mart is awful. It feels like a halfway house...and that's just the employees.
3. 99 Cents Only. I'm the only person I know that actually spends enough there to use a credit card.
4. ABC Store. When I'm in Hawaii, I love shopping here. It has taken the place of Hilo Hatties in my heart. Another thing is you can find them on pretty much any street.
5. Big Lots. I find the damndest things here. They get these odd close outs on steak sauces that I love. Believe it or not, I've found a couple of decent wines here too.
6. Costco. Believe me, I do go through that much toilet paper.
7. Bevmo. Do I really need to explain?
8. Trader Joes. They have very cool food stuff plus great wine prices. I do a lot of shopping here around the holidays.
9. Sprouts. This is a new store in my town and I love it. Great price on produce.
10. Black Phoenix Alchemy Lab. I blame this entirely on Gypsy. They've got great perfume oils. Last year's Pumpkin Patch was to die for. Feeds my inner goth girl.
11. Amazon.com. Duh! Even worse now that I'm Prime.
12. iTunes. I'm connected via PayPal. With just one little click I can have the single "How Bizarre" by OMC with little guilt.
13. Barnes and Noble. Both brick and mortar and online. Great bookstore, nice prices.
The purpose of the meme is to get to know everyone who participates a little bit better every Thursday. Visiting fellow Thirteeners is encouraged! If you participate, leave the link to your Thirteen in others comments. It’s easy, and fun! Be sure to update your Thirteen with links that are left for you, as well! I will link to everyone who participates and leaves a link to their 13 things. Trackbacks, pings, comment links accepted!
View More Thursday Thirteen Participants
Getting Back Into The Swing
Well, my BIAW I did last week didn't do much...at first. I wrote maybe half a page the entire week. Then yesterday, I wrote over 1000 words. Perhaps it was the realization that things are not going to change. There are always going to be kids in the house driving me crazy. There is always going to be a pile of laundry to fold. There will always be dishes in the sink to be washed. And there is always another chapter to complete. For most of us, there will never be a perfect time to write. We may get an hour or two without interruption, but quite often it is accomplished at the sacrifice of something else (yesterday Melissa talks about how her sacrifice affected her the next day). Sometimes it feels worth it, other times it doesn't.
However, my defibrillator moment occurred yesterday when I saw Nienke's blog. Go check it out. Something about it truly jarred me from my lackadascal attitude and got me writing. Sometimes its the little things.
However, my defibrillator moment occurred yesterday when I saw Nienke's blog. Go check it out. Something about it truly jarred me from my lackadascal attitude and got me writing. Sometimes its the little things.
Wednesday, July 11, 2007
Kathleen Woodiwiss
Kathleen Woodiwiss died at the age of 68 yesterday. It was a little jarring to me, it meant the true end of an era. The summer between 6th and 7th grade, my neighbor lady lent "Shanna" to my mom. My mother was never a romance reader so she tossed it aside. I found it and literally my life path changed. I was so enamored of that book, I cannot tell you how many times I've read it. But after reading it, I knew I wanted to be a writer. She brought such passion and vivid characterization to her novels, it blew me away.
Younger readers and writers are probably unable to appreciate how important she was to the romance industry. She and others like Shirlee Busbee, Rosemary Rogers and Jennifer Wilde put historical romance on the map.
People put these books down now, but that is truly unfair. There was far more than heaving bosoms and uber Alpha males running around. There was always adventure and passion on a grand scale. They were not politically correct, there was always an edge to the relationships. But they engrossed me, pulling me into another world so completely, I never wanted to leave.
Goodbye, Ms. Woodiwiss, your work meant more to me than even I realized.
Are any of you Woodiwiss fans? Which was your favorite?
Sunday, July 08, 2007
Book In A Week
I've been a slacker in the writing department for awhile. I whine with excuses but really I'm just out of the groove. So I'm going to do a Book In A Week over at Villa in Tuscany starting tomorrow if you care to join me. The goal is simple, try to write as much as you can during the week. This isn't a time to beat yourself up, just a week where you can spend some extra attention on your WIP. Maybe push yourself to finish or give yourself the impetus to start.
I'll try to have some inspiration to keep you going everyday. Doesn't Gerard Butler look pensive here? I think he is contemplating all the wonderful things we are going to be writing this week.
Friday, July 06, 2007
A Big Rock
So last weekend hubby and I took off just the two of us for a road trip up the coast. Wow, what a great time we had. We haven't had a weekend alone since before Thing was born 4 1/2 years ago. It was so quiet.First stop was Morro Bay. I love the rock. From there we headed up the road and stopped in Cambria, a little artsy community in a foresty area near the ocean. Then it was on to Monterey. We stayed the night in Monterey then got up early and headed for Napa Valley.
I did a little wine tasting. Well, I did a lot of wine tasting. We only hit 3 wineries (all we had time for) but one of them was Mumm so I got to taste some sparkling wine. Very much worth it.
The biggest plus, however, was spending time with hubby. With all the stresses of our lives, it is sometimes hard to remember what drew you to your spouse and why you are still married. I honestly feared we would have nothing to talk about but the kids. We hardly talked about them at all. In fact, we enjoyed the silence. Neither of us felt compelled to talk. Of course, conversation in a convertible going over 60 mph makes chatting difficult. But it was so pleasant and rejeuvenating.
Now, back to the grind. But at least I've had a chance to take a deep breath and have some great memories to think about.
Tuesday, July 03, 2007
Square Pegs
When I set out to write my last book, I didn't really think about it. I didn't think of the genre, the marketability, etc. In fact, it was probably my most thoughtless book to date. When I write historicals, certain elements guide me and the same goes for paranormals. But this book was different and therein lies the problem.
It blends 3 different genres pretty much equally. Therefore, it doesn't really fit anywhere. As I'm learning, commercial publishing is made up of round holes. And my book isn't out-there enough to be its own unique niche.
The feedback I've received on my book is good. They like my writing. But the book sits on too many fences to make it marketable. This is the problem with writing straight from the heart. While the publishers want fresh voices, they don't want something they have no idea how to market.
Knowing this, would I have written the book differently? I'm not sure. I enjoyed writing the book and I felt like it was a great writing experience. Will I write the next one differently? Oh yeah.
I'm not trying to write the great novel which expresses my pain and doubt at the human condition. I'm not trying to write a piece of brilliant fiction filled with the angst of my soul. I'm writing to entertain. I'm not trying to teach lessons or make a statement. So I'm flexible. I'm married, I have kids, I'm used to compromise. Now to get my butt in gear and get writing.
It blends 3 different genres pretty much equally. Therefore, it doesn't really fit anywhere. As I'm learning, commercial publishing is made up of round holes. And my book isn't out-there enough to be its own unique niche.
The feedback I've received on my book is good. They like my writing. But the book sits on too many fences to make it marketable. This is the problem with writing straight from the heart. While the publishers want fresh voices, they don't want something they have no idea how to market.
Knowing this, would I have written the book differently? I'm not sure. I enjoyed writing the book and I felt like it was a great writing experience. Will I write the next one differently? Oh yeah.
I'm not trying to write the great novel which expresses my pain and doubt at the human condition. I'm not trying to write a piece of brilliant fiction filled with the angst of my soul. I'm writing to entertain. I'm not trying to teach lessons or make a statement. So I'm flexible. I'm married, I have kids, I'm used to compromise. Now to get my butt in gear and get writing.
Monday, July 02, 2007
Tumultuous
I really planned on blogging all week last week but it was an odd week.
I got bad news from my agent. My book is nearing the end of the line with editors and we had to make the decision about where to go next. We could take it to smaller publishers, but she didn't think that was a good idea. Based on her reasoning, I agree with her. Ergo, the book will soon retire to the ol' hard drive. It won't be alone and I have to say this book went further than any before it and who knows, it may eventually find its way to publication eventually. Why it was rejected and why we are letting it go is a blog post all on its own.
I'm not a big chocolate fan so I couldn't really bury my disappointment in a Cadbury bar. I did get a manicure and a pedicure. I also got my hair colored and bought a bunch of new clothes. I also went to a cocktail party with my hubby and Friday we took off for the weekend up the coast just the two of us.
While I'm disappointed, I'm not devistated. In the general scheme of things, not getting this book published is not all that tragic. I suppose that is what keeps me in perspective. As tough as rejection is, it is not the end of the world.
Now I have to get myself writing. I spent much of the weekend sorting through story ideas in my head. I have to admit, it is difficult mustering up a whole lot of enthusiasm right now. I feel like I'm walking on creative eggshells. My biggest problem is that I think too much and I'm not relying on the insticnt which has guided me all these years. So now I need to silence that little voice and go with the flow.
Now I'm back to playing catch up on the blogs. I've got a little jet lag and a bit of a hangover (wine tasting), so I might have to wait until tomorrow.
I got bad news from my agent. My book is nearing the end of the line with editors and we had to make the decision about where to go next. We could take it to smaller publishers, but she didn't think that was a good idea. Based on her reasoning, I agree with her. Ergo, the book will soon retire to the ol' hard drive. It won't be alone and I have to say this book went further than any before it and who knows, it may eventually find its way to publication eventually. Why it was rejected and why we are letting it go is a blog post all on its own.
I'm not a big chocolate fan so I couldn't really bury my disappointment in a Cadbury bar. I did get a manicure and a pedicure. I also got my hair colored and bought a bunch of new clothes. I also went to a cocktail party with my hubby and Friday we took off for the weekend up the coast just the two of us.
While I'm disappointed, I'm not devistated. In the general scheme of things, not getting this book published is not all that tragic. I suppose that is what keeps me in perspective. As tough as rejection is, it is not the end of the world.
Now I have to get myself writing. I spent much of the weekend sorting through story ideas in my head. I have to admit, it is difficult mustering up a whole lot of enthusiasm right now. I feel like I'm walking on creative eggshells. My biggest problem is that I think too much and I'm not relying on the insticnt which has guided me all these years. So now I need to silence that little voice and go with the flow.
Now I'm back to playing catch up on the blogs. I've got a little jet lag and a bit of a hangover (wine tasting), so I might have to wait until tomorrow.
Monday, June 25, 2007
Disappearing Act
Seems like a fell off the face of the planet, doesn't it? I basically did, my Internet kept going in and out for nearly a week. Do you know how much stuff you can get done without the distraction of the Internet? I spent a week cleaning house, I mean really cleaning. I rearranged cabinets and closets, cracked the whip on the kids, you name it.
I didn't do much writing, however, I did get an AlphaSmart. I won a Dana on Ebay and I love it, if only I loved my writing as much right now.
My hubby had a deposition down San Diego way on Friday so we all went down with him. I dropped him off at the depo then headed over to Legoland. We had a blast, when my husband was done, the court reporter dropped him off and he joined us. We spent the night and came back to the park the next day. The kids really enjoyed it and I liked the fact the temperature never got above 73 degrees.
My son started enrichment classes this week from 8-12 everyday. The girls enterain themselves while their brother is away by fighting. Geez, these kids can whine. I've told them today if they can quit fighting for an hour or so we will make chocolate chip cookies.
Now to play catch up on all your news!
I didn't do much writing, however, I did get an AlphaSmart. I won a Dana on Ebay and I love it, if only I loved my writing as much right now.
My hubby had a deposition down San Diego way on Friday so we all went down with him. I dropped him off at the depo then headed over to Legoland. We had a blast, when my husband was done, the court reporter dropped him off and he joined us. We spent the night and came back to the park the next day. The kids really enjoyed it and I liked the fact the temperature never got above 73 degrees.
My son started enrichment classes this week from 8-12 everyday. The girls enterain themselves while their brother is away by fighting. Geez, these kids can whine. I've told them today if they can quit fighting for an hour or so we will make chocolate chip cookies.
Now to play catch up on all your news!
Sunday, June 10, 2007
8 Things I Like
Willow tagged me with a meme. I've actually done it before so I thought I'd give it a twist.
Here are 8 things I like:
1. Movie star men. I love the larger than life personas they have. Hugh Jackman as Van Helsing, Daniel Craig as James Bond and Johnny Depp as, well, anything, feed my daydreams.
2. Perfect fruit. I do not like fruit. I think it is because it is hard to get really good fruit in the store. This morning I was out in the yard and I picked an apricot off the tree and it was perfect. If I could this kind of fruit all the time, I'd fruit.
3. Martha Stewart. Not her personally, but everything she represents. She presents a lifestyle that is graceful and effortless. Yeah, its an illusion, but I read her magazine like some men read "Playboy." I know these things only exist in the glossy pages of "Living," but I still enjoy the pictures.
4. Books. There's a no-brainer. I love books, love to read them, love to write them. I love to look a them at the bookstore.
5. A hot shower. Isn't it amazing how a little hot water and foo-foo soap can restore a person?
6. A roaring fire on a cold winter night. We discovered we could actually use our fireplace this winter. What a difference it made. There is nothing like dozing in front of the fire while watching t.v.
7. Rose gardens. I love roses, but only on rose bushes. I don't care for cut roses although I will cut some of my own for a centerpiece. But rose gardens are something else. They are generally planned with attention of a person. My husband has his planted in rows, recorded in a notebook so he knows what is where and where he can add more. He tends his rose garden with care. I like the fact rose gardens are created with pleasure in mind.
8. Baking. I don't like the clean up, but I love to bake. Bread, cakes, pies, any of it. I get such satisfaction from turning two cups of flour into something wonderful.
What are some of the things that you like?
Here are 8 things I like:
1. Movie star men. I love the larger than life personas they have. Hugh Jackman as Van Helsing, Daniel Craig as James Bond and Johnny Depp as, well, anything, feed my daydreams.
2. Perfect fruit. I do not like fruit. I think it is because it is hard to get really good fruit in the store. This morning I was out in the yard and I picked an apricot off the tree and it was perfect. If I could this kind of fruit all the time, I'd fruit.
3. Martha Stewart. Not her personally, but everything she represents. She presents a lifestyle that is graceful and effortless. Yeah, its an illusion, but I read her magazine like some men read "Playboy." I know these things only exist in the glossy pages of "Living," but I still enjoy the pictures.
4. Books. There's a no-brainer. I love books, love to read them, love to write them. I love to look a them at the bookstore.
5. A hot shower. Isn't it amazing how a little hot water and foo-foo soap can restore a person?
6. A roaring fire on a cold winter night. We discovered we could actually use our fireplace this winter. What a difference it made. There is nothing like dozing in front of the fire while watching t.v.
7. Rose gardens. I love roses, but only on rose bushes. I don't care for cut roses although I will cut some of my own for a centerpiece. But rose gardens are something else. They are generally planned with attention of a person. My husband has his planted in rows, recorded in a notebook so he knows what is where and where he can add more. He tends his rose garden with care. I like the fact rose gardens are created with pleasure in mind.
8. Baking. I don't like the clean up, but I love to bake. Bread, cakes, pies, any of it. I get such satisfaction from turning two cups of flour into something wonderful.
What are some of the things that you like?
Wednesday, June 06, 2007
I plan this every year and every year something happens and we don't go.
1. The Big Island. We took the kids last year and they had a blast. My folks are planning on going with us so it should be more fun and easier.
2. The Arboretum. I remember going here as a kid and really enjoying it. If anything, it has large expanses of space where kids can run around.
3. California Science Center. My son has been here several times and always enjoys it. I think my other two might appreciate it now.
4. The Getty. I've wanted to go since it opened but always something comes up. My two older kids really enjoy art and their school makes it a serious part of their curriculum, so I think they would appreciate it.
5. American Girl Place. Okay, so I probably will let Supernerd out of this one. The girls are really going to have to behave because I know they want one of those damn dolls.
6. The Huntington Library. I live about 20 miles from this place and I've never been there. I hear it is incredible and I know my kids will like it.
7. Legoland. My kids love this place. I like it because it is in Carlsbad and always several degrees cooler than home. The food is good too.
8. Natural History Museum. They got dinosaurs.
9. La Brea Tarpits. They got sabre tooth tigers.
10. Aquarium of the Pacific. Both of my older kids have been here more than once. I've never been. Too bad they have to do what I say. I'd love to see it.
11. Raging Waters. We are getting season passes. Its only a few miles from my house so I figure we will be going at least once a week, probably more often.
12. The Claremont Club. Most of everyday will probably be spent here. I can get 3 hours of free babysitting, hence the reason I want an AlphaSmart. I can stay in the shade while the kids go swimming and do whatever.
13. Home. Nothing exciting in that, but my husband has worked very hard to have a nice yard for them to play. We have a croquet set, badminton, bocce ball and a sunk golf hole. I'm hoping they can enjoy the simple games. Sometimes the simplest pleasures are the best.
The purpose of the meme is to get to know everyone who participates a little bit better every Thursday. Visiting fellow Thirteeners is encouraged! If you participate, leave the link to your Thirteen in others comments. It’s easy, and fun! Be sure to update your Thirteen with links that are left for you, as well! I will link to everyone who participates and leaves a link to their 13 things. Trackbacks, pings, comment links accepted!
View More Thursday Thirteen Participants
AlphaSmart
I work on a laptop. Well, its a laptop in name only. Its a big Sony Vaio which is pretty good but it isn't portable. Its heavy and too wide to fit into a laptop case. The battery sucks and drains completely after about 40 minutes. Ridiculous, I know, but for the most part, it isn't an issue.
However, this summer I plan on going lots of places with the kids or staying outside with them when they are playing. I'd like something more portable and far more rugged. All I need is something to write on. So I'm considering an AlphaSmart, probably the Dana. I thought about getting the wireless option, but I really wonder if that is a wise idea. I spend way too much time on the Internet as it is.
Do any of you have one or know someone who does? What do you think or what do have you heard?
Tuesday, June 05, 2007
So Now What?
I don't like to admit it but the single biggest issue I have with writing is my last book.
When my book first started its journey into the shadowy world of editors, my enthusiasm for writing was high. I quickly wrote the first few chapters of the sequel book then dove into something new. But as the rejections started coming in, my elan faded and doubt took its place.
I have no doubts that I'm a good writer. I'm confident in my own abilities to realize my trouble isn't with the quality of my writing. Where my doubts come in is whether I write marketable stuff. We as writers sling around platitudes about writing what we love and what our heart dictates. I've followed a version of that theory in all my writing. But once the rejections started pouring in, well, maybe not pouring since my book has only been with a few editors, my attitude changed and not for the better.
No, it isn't any easier to anticipate the market from an editor's comments. They all have a different opinion as to why the book wasn't right for them. Obviously trying to gauge how well a book will do with this variety of opinions is nigh on impossible. I know this, but the doubts creep in.
I feel like I'm at the Hilary Step on Everest. The most challenging part of the climb is the summit ridge. All the really hard work has happened already, but I'm mentally worn out. I can see the sale, see the summit of my journey, but these last few obstacles are here. And I'm not sure how to face them or work with them. I have a well-regarded agent who knows her business and works hard for me. I don't want to waste this opportunity, I don't want to waste her time and mine by writing a book that isn't going to sell.
It crippled my writing. I kept flitting from project to project, starting and stopping because I wasn't confident that it was marketable. Talk about a maze with no end!
I can write about it now because I seem to have gotten over my hang up. I'm back to writing. I realized that I was thinking too much rather than letting my writing work itself out. I need to trust my instincts more rather than trying to think too hard. By worrying about what I think is going to sell, I lose the value of my writing. I suppress just the thing that attracted my agent in the first place. I'm back to writing and more importanly I'm enjoying it. One thing my agent said when she signed me is that she felt the fun in my writing. She had fun reading it and felt the fun I had writing it. So I guess that is the lesson I've learned. Go with instinct, it won't let you down.
Now I'm hoping my blogroll is back up. I sat down yesterday evening to catch up with everyone and the darn thing crashed and I don't have my links saved anywhere else.
When my book first started its journey into the shadowy world of editors, my enthusiasm for writing was high. I quickly wrote the first few chapters of the sequel book then dove into something new. But as the rejections started coming in, my elan faded and doubt took its place.
I have no doubts that I'm a good writer. I'm confident in my own abilities to realize my trouble isn't with the quality of my writing. Where my doubts come in is whether I write marketable stuff. We as writers sling around platitudes about writing what we love and what our heart dictates. I've followed a version of that theory in all my writing. But once the rejections started pouring in, well, maybe not pouring since my book has only been with a few editors, my attitude changed and not for the better.
No, it isn't any easier to anticipate the market from an editor's comments. They all have a different opinion as to why the book wasn't right for them. Obviously trying to gauge how well a book will do with this variety of opinions is nigh on impossible. I know this, but the doubts creep in.
I feel like I'm at the Hilary Step on Everest. The most challenging part of the climb is the summit ridge. All the really hard work has happened already, but I'm mentally worn out. I can see the sale, see the summit of my journey, but these last few obstacles are here. And I'm not sure how to face them or work with them. I have a well-regarded agent who knows her business and works hard for me. I don't want to waste this opportunity, I don't want to waste her time and mine by writing a book that isn't going to sell.
It crippled my writing. I kept flitting from project to project, starting and stopping because I wasn't confident that it was marketable. Talk about a maze with no end!
I can write about it now because I seem to have gotten over my hang up. I'm back to writing. I realized that I was thinking too much rather than letting my writing work itself out. I need to trust my instincts more rather than trying to think too hard. By worrying about what I think is going to sell, I lose the value of my writing. I suppress just the thing that attracted my agent in the first place. I'm back to writing and more importanly I'm enjoying it. One thing my agent said when she signed me is that she felt the fun in my writing. She had fun reading it and felt the fun I had writing it. So I guess that is the lesson I've learned. Go with instinct, it won't let you down.
Now I'm hoping my blogroll is back up. I sat down yesterday evening to catch up with everyone and the darn thing crashed and I don't have my links saved anywhere else.
Monday, June 04, 2007
Changes
I'm a big believer in change as my oft changing blog skin can attest. Change is the mechanism we use to improve ourselves and our lives.
We had a big change around the ol' casa this weekend. My husband turned my daughter's room into...well, we aren't exactly sure. The one thing it isn't is a kid's room. He pulled out the carpet and put in laminate. He added crown molding at the ceiling. My youngest now sleeps upstairs. While I greet the change with relief and joy, the displaced child is not so happy. Moving upstairs means she is becoming a big girl and she isn't real keen on that. She's happy being the baby. But change is good and while she won't like it at the start, I'm guessing by the end of summer she will embrace it.
Changes run the gamut. Some are anticipated, others are not. Some changes make us decry our fate. I'm real good at that. But eventually we have to accept change and decide what we are going to do with it. We either sink or swim. Sometimes sinking doesn't sound like such a bad option. Swimming is tough and exhausting. But it gets us to the other side.
I tend to want make wide, sweeping changes. The changes I wish to make reflect goals which are, frankly, nigh impossible to accomplish. Or I tend to focus on the goal and not on the process it takes to accomplish it. I do it with everything from weight loss to housework and most definitely with writing.
This week I want to focus on my diet and fitness. My goal is to lose, well, a lot, but putting that plan in motion has always been a problem. My other goal is to be more focused. I'm easily distracted and thus I don't accomplish what I want to accomplish. Which leads to frustration. I've started writing lists again. I focus better if I see the words written down, imagine that.
Anyway, for this week, my focus is on what I'm eating and making exercise a priority. I'm hoping to make going to the gym second nature because I cannot lose weight unless I exercise. My goal is to make going to the gym something I do as a habit like drinking coffee. The more I go the more it becomes necessary.
Do you look for change or do you avoid it? What has been the biggest changes in your life recently both positive and negative? How are you dealing with them?
We had a big change around the ol' casa this weekend. My husband turned my daughter's room into...well, we aren't exactly sure. The one thing it isn't is a kid's room. He pulled out the carpet and put in laminate. He added crown molding at the ceiling. My youngest now sleeps upstairs. While I greet the change with relief and joy, the displaced child is not so happy. Moving upstairs means she is becoming a big girl and she isn't real keen on that. She's happy being the baby. But change is good and while she won't like it at the start, I'm guessing by the end of summer she will embrace it.
Changes run the gamut. Some are anticipated, others are not. Some changes make us decry our fate. I'm real good at that. But eventually we have to accept change and decide what we are going to do with it. We either sink or swim. Sometimes sinking doesn't sound like such a bad option. Swimming is tough and exhausting. But it gets us to the other side.
I tend to want make wide, sweeping changes. The changes I wish to make reflect goals which are, frankly, nigh impossible to accomplish. Or I tend to focus on the goal and not on the process it takes to accomplish it. I do it with everything from weight loss to housework and most definitely with writing.
This week I want to focus on my diet and fitness. My goal is to lose, well, a lot, but putting that plan in motion has always been a problem. My other goal is to be more focused. I'm easily distracted and thus I don't accomplish what I want to accomplish. Which leads to frustration. I've started writing lists again. I focus better if I see the words written down, imagine that.
Anyway, for this week, my focus is on what I'm eating and making exercise a priority. I'm hoping to make going to the gym second nature because I cannot lose weight unless I exercise. My goal is to make going to the gym something I do as a habit like drinking coffee. The more I go the more it becomes necessary.
Do you look for change or do you avoid it? What has been the biggest changes in your life recently both positive and negative? How are you dealing with them?
Wednesday, May 30, 2007
Vanishing Act
Don't you hate it when a blogger disappears and you have no idea where they are?
Sigh...
I wish I had some long tale of woe or wonder to explain my absence but I don't. I have the blahs. Not depression. I'm actually quite creative when I'm depressed and I tend to write more.
The blahs are something different. Its like being on a sailboat in the water and the wind dies. You could probably start the motor and get going but you don't because if you do, you'll just have to go back to the dock and leave the Coronas behind as you pick up the threads of reality.
I haven't totally disappeared. Friday I blogged about writing over at Journey. I think I might have posted over at my MySpace blog in the last week as well. But still, I've been pretty absent.
Maybe it is spring fever, but I don't feel particularly wild. I've been reading a lot. I've given up updating my sidebar for books since I'm whipping through them so fast. I wish I could say the same about writing. I'm not doing much. I wrote a few pages on a historical to try and light my spark. Didn't work as well as I planned but I at least I got some writing done.
Anyone else got the blahs? If you do, how do you leave them behind?
Sigh...
I wish I had some long tale of woe or wonder to explain my absence but I don't. I have the blahs. Not depression. I'm actually quite creative when I'm depressed and I tend to write more.
The blahs are something different. Its like being on a sailboat in the water and the wind dies. You could probably start the motor and get going but you don't because if you do, you'll just have to go back to the dock and leave the Coronas behind as you pick up the threads of reality.
I haven't totally disappeared. Friday I blogged about writing over at Journey. I think I might have posted over at my MySpace blog in the last week as well. But still, I've been pretty absent.
Maybe it is spring fever, but I don't feel particularly wild. I've been reading a lot. I've given up updating my sidebar for books since I'm whipping through them so fast. I wish I could say the same about writing. I'm not doing much. I wrote a few pages on a historical to try and light my spark. Didn't work as well as I planned but I at least I got some writing done.
Anyone else got the blahs? If you do, how do you leave them behind?
Monday, May 21, 2007
40
First, I want to thank all of you who commiserated with me about my kid. Misery loves company and I'm glad I'm not the only one with a monster child. My nephew was over last night and he makes my kid look like an angel, so I guess I should be thankful for what I have.
Today is my birthday, the big Four-OH. Doesn't really seem to be a big deal anymore. I will say having a pre-schooler at 40 was not in my game plan. When my mom turned 40, she was seeing her only child graduate from high school. Sigh...
Hubby bought me a really pretty heart necklace, I'll try and get a picture of it one of these days. It is a floating heart on a white gold chain made up of yellow and pink sapphires and diamonds. He also got me a nice watch. My watches usually come from the clearance section of Wal Mart, so it is a nice change. Last night we had the family over and hubby fried chicken in the deep fryer outside. It was so good. Today promises to be nice as well. My parents are picking my daughter up this morning and my friend and I are going out to lunch. My folks are going to pick up my kids after school and feed them dinner so hubby and I can go out by ourselves. All in all a good day.
I'm not a big birtday fan. I feel better when they are over. I suppose the anticipation of a decade birthday adds stress. But I think 40 is a good year and one which will bring many possibilities. If nothing else, my youngest will be starting school. That counts for something, right?
Today is my birthday, the big Four-OH. Doesn't really seem to be a big deal anymore. I will say having a pre-schooler at 40 was not in my game plan. When my mom turned 40, she was seeing her only child graduate from high school. Sigh...
Hubby bought me a really pretty heart necklace, I'll try and get a picture of it one of these days. It is a floating heart on a white gold chain made up of yellow and pink sapphires and diamonds. He also got me a nice watch. My watches usually come from the clearance section of Wal Mart, so it is a nice change. Last night we had the family over and hubby fried chicken in the deep fryer outside. It was so good. Today promises to be nice as well. My parents are picking my daughter up this morning and my friend and I are going out to lunch. My folks are going to pick up my kids after school and feed them dinner so hubby and I can go out by ourselves. All in all a good day.
I'm not a big birtday fan. I feel better when they are over. I suppose the anticipation of a decade birthday adds stress. But I think 40 is a good year and one which will bring many possibilities. If nothing else, my youngest will be starting school. That counts for something, right?
Saturday, May 19, 2007
Aggravations
I can't believe its been a week since I blogged. It has been a week of non-stop annoyances and aggravations. This time of the year usually brings its own special brand of irritation. We are seeing the very end of baseball (YESSSS!!!) which has its own ends and rituals. This morning I'm going out on a quest for thank you cards and gift certificates for the coaches and team moms. Also on the agenda is registration for soccer. We don't start until August but registration is now. My son's science fair project is due this week and I've been working with him on that. He didn't do one last year and the principal ripped him a new one, so I put my foot down on it this year.
The rest are things that zap me mentally and emotionally. Mother's Day was a big bag of petty annoyances, none of which I will get into because it gets me spewing fire. Suffice it to say sometimes I wished I married an orphan. The other biggie is my 7 year old. Diva is truly living up to her name right now. I'm so mad at her right now, I don't want her around. She is so self-centered and blind to anything that doesn't have to do with her, it's incredible. I expected this behavior at 12, not 7. And if one more person tells me how sweet she is, I'm going to explode. At school she is the darling. She listens, she helps the teacher, she helps other students. She has a reputation for kindness and is a friend to everyone. At home....*shudder* I don't get it. On the baseball team, skills wise she is one of the better players, but as soon as she hits the field she is either goofing around or whining. At home, she is always dragging her dad out to play ball with her, but once she is with the team, she turns into a brat. Hand me the Tums, please.
All the turmoil has drained me of creativity. The thought of writing exhausts me. Heck, the simple act of blogging is a monumental effort. I think part of it is burn out. The school year is coming to an end and I'm burned out right along with the kids. While they have school, I have the school and sports functions I've been responsible for. Hopefully summer will help, but if my daughter keeps up with her behavior, I'm not too hopeful.
The rest are things that zap me mentally and emotionally. Mother's Day was a big bag of petty annoyances, none of which I will get into because it gets me spewing fire. Suffice it to say sometimes I wished I married an orphan. The other biggie is my 7 year old. Diva is truly living up to her name right now. I'm so mad at her right now, I don't want her around. She is so self-centered and blind to anything that doesn't have to do with her, it's incredible. I expected this behavior at 12, not 7. And if one more person tells me how sweet she is, I'm going to explode. At school she is the darling. She listens, she helps the teacher, she helps other students. She has a reputation for kindness and is a friend to everyone. At home....*shudder* I don't get it. On the baseball team, skills wise she is one of the better players, but as soon as she hits the field she is either goofing around or whining. At home, she is always dragging her dad out to play ball with her, but once she is with the team, she turns into a brat. Hand me the Tums, please.
All the turmoil has drained me of creativity. The thought of writing exhausts me. Heck, the simple act of blogging is a monumental effort. I think part of it is burn out. The school year is coming to an end and I'm burned out right along with the kids. While they have school, I have the school and sports functions I've been responsible for. Hopefully summer will help, but if my daughter keeps up with her behavior, I'm not too hopeful.
Sunday, May 13, 2007
Special Guest
As some of you know, I'm a patsy for the paranormal. I like all manner of preternaturals like werewolves, goblins, faeries and Paris Hilton. But vampires hold a soft spot in my heart. Not sure why. I'm not alone in my fascination. Silhouette has read this desire and is featuring the undead in their Nocturne line. The latest is Caridad Pineiro's Blood Calls
. This is the sixth book in an ongoing series.Diego Rivera lost his life during the Spanish Inquisition, but when he is saved by becoming a vampire, he swears to become a better man. Ramona Escobar is a promising young artist who is struggling with a mother with Alzheimer’s and a disease that is slowly robbing Ramona of life. Ramona unwittingly becomes involved in an art fraud and when her life is threatened, handsome art gallery owner Diego Rivera comes to her aid. Attraction will flare to life between the two, but both Diego and Ramona are hiding secrets. When Diego reveals his true face to Ramona, she reveals the true of her existence – that she will soon die. Will love help Diego find a way to deal with Ramona’s betrayal and his own secrets, or is it the call of her blood that is tempting him to put the bite on her?
I was fortunate enough to ask Caridad a few questions about writing and the popularity of the undead.
As a writer, how hard is it to switch genres? Going from police procedurals to Latina chick lit to dark paranormal seems like a tough jump, how does you do it?
It is hard to switch genres at times, especially when you have deadlines for both books. I generally like to stay with each genre at one time, but that hasn’t been possible lately. When I am writing the dark vampire novels and romantic suspense, I am in one mindset and the women’s fiction mindset is very very different. For the dark vampire novels, I am concentrating on the paranormal elements and the psychic wounds of the protagonists. These psychic wounds will oftentimes impact on life and death situations. For my women’s fiction, the stories generally revolve around the relationships of women and while the conflicts there are life-altering, they are grounded much more in reality and do not have life and death consequences. They do, however, impact on the life courses of the protagonists. As for the suspense stories that I write, the focus there is generally on the romance and how the mystery impacts on that relationship. There’s actually more similarity between my romantic suspense novels and the vampire novels as both generally have a mystery and of course, romantic elements.
BLOOD CALLS is the 6th book in a series that started awhile back. Was it tough to pick it back up or has this story been floating around in your head for awhile?
I knew when I wrote TEMPTATION CALLS (October 2005) that I wasn’t done with the stories for some of the characters. TEMPTATION CALLS turned out to be one of my favorite books because of the characters and their very unique lives. From that one book, I’ve been able to spin off DEVOTION CALLS (January 2007) and BLOOD CALLS (May 2007) as well as FURY CALLS (tba 2008). I hadn’t planned on so many other stories from that one when I started, but as I wrote, I realized that there were a number of secondary characters that were so unique that I had to explore them in greater depth. Part of it is that I like to write series and always try to make the secondary characters so real that people want to know more about them. The one hard thing about this is that you need to keep them in the background and not let them overwhelm the main story.
Why vampires? Why do readers come back to the undead again and again and again?
I think people have always been fascinated by the otherworldly creatures and vampires in particular. There is the fascination with immortality and what it would be like to never die. We always imagine them as romantic and sometimes tragic creatures. We also think of them as very sensual creatures and the sharing of blood is definitely high on the list of intimate acts. For all those reasons, readers love vampires.
How is Diego unique amongst his kind?
In my mythology, Diego is unique in that his age makes him nearly an elder. That age gives him greater powers and a higher rank in the Manhattan vampire hierarchy. It also brings profound worry in him since with each year that passes, Diego has seen the loneliness of those around him and has experience his own loss – his long time vampire companion was killed nearly two years earlier. With her passing, Diego sees himself on the way to becoming like the other vampire elders – devoid of passion for anything other than blood. Lonely. When Diego finds himself attracted to a human, however, he wonders if he can allow himself to experience her passion or if by doing so, he will doom himself to even greater misery.
Hmm...sounds like a vampire in need of heroine's touch. If you are a sucker for blood suckers, Caridad has created a world for you. For more information on Caridad, please visit www.caridad.com or watch her interview at www.romancenovel.tv.
Wednesday, May 09, 2007
8 Things Things You Probably Didn't Need to Know About Me
I got hit with this meme from both Toni and Bebe.
1. Each player starts with eight random facts/habits about themselves.
2. People who are tagged need to write their own blog about their eight things and post these rules.
3. At the end of your blog, you need to choose eight people to get tagged and list their names.
4. Don't forget to leave them a comment telling them they're tagged, and to read your blog.
Here we go:
1. I'm allergic to olive trees. The blossoms send me into massive sneezing fits.
2. I'm an only child.
3. I'd never changed a diaper until my son was born. Personally, I could have skipped that part of motherhood.
4. I've been to Hawaii six times and I'm planning my seventh.
5. I broke both of my pinkies when I was Christmas caroling. I was about 9 I guess and they healed funny. When I did NaNoWriMo they were in constant pain from the typing. Beer took care of the problem.
6. I married my boss. I was a legal secretary, he was the partner I worked for. How sordid is that?
7. I have to wear orthotics in my shoes. The structure of my hips makes my gait wrong and I get severe shin splints. The orthotics correct the problem. Of course, the less I weigh, the less necessary the orthotics are, no surprise there.
8. I've been dying my hair red since 1993. I have no idea what my natural color is anymore except that it has lots of gray.
Okay, now I have to tag 8 people. Gypsy, Amy, Chys, Kelly, Lory, Teresa, Zephra, and Henri.
1. Each player starts with eight random facts/habits about themselves.
2. People who are tagged need to write their own blog about their eight things and post these rules.
3. At the end of your blog, you need to choose eight people to get tagged and list their names.
4. Don't forget to leave them a comment telling them they're tagged, and to read your blog.
Here we go:
1. I'm allergic to olive trees. The blossoms send me into massive sneezing fits.
2. I'm an only child.
3. I'd never changed a diaper until my son was born. Personally, I could have skipped that part of motherhood.
4. I've been to Hawaii six times and I'm planning my seventh.
5. I broke both of my pinkies when I was Christmas caroling. I was about 9 I guess and they healed funny. When I did NaNoWriMo they were in constant pain from the typing. Beer took care of the problem.
6. I married my boss. I was a legal secretary, he was the partner I worked for. How sordid is that?
7. I have to wear orthotics in my shoes. The structure of my hips makes my gait wrong and I get severe shin splints. The orthotics correct the problem. Of course, the less I weigh, the less necessary the orthotics are, no surprise there.
8. I've been dying my hair red since 1993. I have no idea what my natural color is anymore except that it has lots of gray.
Okay, now I have to tag 8 people. Gypsy, Amy, Chys, Kelly, Lory, Teresa, Zephra, and Henri.
Thursday, May 03, 2007
$138,095
Salary.com , "compensation experts," have compiled a list of a stay-at-home-mom's jobs and figured out she would be paid about $138K a year for her efforts.
Interesting.
This number has started a flurry of opinions. Amazing what a hot button issue this is. Usually it boils down to an appreciation factor and misconceptions.
When I worked outside the home, my workmates and I would head down to Target for lunch time shopping. We'd watch the SAHM's shopping with their kids and we'd be filled with envy. How great would it be to have the freedom to go shopping with your kids? How awesome would it be to head over with the crumb crushers for a perky lunch at McDonald's? Boy, those women had the life.
Skip up a couple of years and I discovered what kind of "paradise" it is shopping with kids. Trips to McDonald's are bribes. All of my pastoral visions of being home were quickly obliterated. When I hung up the pantyhose and pumps for sneakers and sweats, I traded in a lot more than a wardrobe.
It isn't that one experience is tougher than another. Moms who work outside the home have a job plus the responsibilities of parenthood. They still have meals to plan and homework to assist with. There is laundry and housework. But when I worked, I also had help. If hubby got home before me, he started dinner and we both did the dishes. On the weekends, we both worked on the laundry. I also had the luxury of using some of my income for a housekeeper who came in every other week to clean. Since no one was home during the day, the house stayed clean. My time was considered more valuable. I actually had more writing time than I do now.
As an SAHM (by the way, I'm not trying to exclude SAH dads, I'm just speaking from my own experiences)I don't have the daycare worries. I don't have to fit in grocery shopping on a weekend. I almost never wear make up. But the expectations also increase.
With the house, there is an expectation it should be clean. Not really out of line...except I hate housework. I cook six nights a week. I don't mind cooking so much and hubby still helps with the dishes, some nights this is the only time we get to have adult conversation. But it is also expected that I will serve on every committee at my kids' school. It means that I should volunteer for team mom/coach/Girl Scout leader/classroom assistant because I have so much time. And most important, that time I get to spend with the children.
My kids are convenient like the ones on "Desperate Housewives." They are always there and constantly demanding something. They fight with each other and they defy me. It is a constant battle to get them to pick up after themselves. If I leave the room, the youngest one is into something. My fridge and pantry are locked. Somedays I have to lock all the rooms in the house just to keep her out of stuff. She's four going on fifteen and figures whatever trouble she gets into, it was probably worth it.
Anyway, enough of the sob story. Parenthood is rough no matter what the circumstances. But people are incensed by the idea of putting a monetary number in relation to parenthood. The value of raising our children and mantaining a loving home defies mere salary. Which is exactly the point and why like to see this kind of validation. It isn't that we think we deserve money or financial compensation and I can tell you, I don't do enough to earn $100K. I just want to do enough to justify my online shopping habits.
Parents who stay at home are either praised as selfless beings devoted to their families, taking satisfaction in the pure joy their nurturing brings. Or they are seen as mindless zombies content to spend their days watching purient televsion munching on Doritos and bon bons. Neither one is true of course, but it does point to one thing: the loss of identity.
My biggest adjustment was my loss of identity as a person. From 8-5 Monday through Friday I was me. Now, there are days where I never hear my name. I am a mother then a wife and that is the extent of it. I do it myself. I allow it.
I think when a parent sees a breakdown of what the value of their services would be in the working world, it makes them appreciate themselves. As mothers, whether you work outside the home or stay at home, we need to appreciate ourselves. We need to appreciate our strengths rather than focusing on our failures.
No one is going to do that for us. Our spouse who spends the day working isn't going to understand how difficult our day is. Our kids aren't going to care. We can only hope they have children of their own and then they will understand.
Look at what you do every day and appreciate the skills it takes to do what you do. Go use the salary wizardand see how much you really do and how tough it really is. Understand how valuable you really are. If you treat yourself like a valued employee, everyone else will to. If not, go on strike.
Interesting.
This number has started a flurry of opinions. Amazing what a hot button issue this is. Usually it boils down to an appreciation factor and misconceptions.
When I worked outside the home, my workmates and I would head down to Target for lunch time shopping. We'd watch the SAHM's shopping with their kids and we'd be filled with envy. How great would it be to have the freedom to go shopping with your kids? How awesome would it be to head over with the crumb crushers for a perky lunch at McDonald's? Boy, those women had the life.
Skip up a couple of years and I discovered what kind of "paradise" it is shopping with kids. Trips to McDonald's are bribes. All of my pastoral visions of being home were quickly obliterated. When I hung up the pantyhose and pumps for sneakers and sweats, I traded in a lot more than a wardrobe.
It isn't that one experience is tougher than another. Moms who work outside the home have a job plus the responsibilities of parenthood. They still have meals to plan and homework to assist with. There is laundry and housework. But when I worked, I also had help. If hubby got home before me, he started dinner and we both did the dishes. On the weekends, we both worked on the laundry. I also had the luxury of using some of my income for a housekeeper who came in every other week to clean. Since no one was home during the day, the house stayed clean. My time was considered more valuable. I actually had more writing time than I do now.
As an SAHM (by the way, I'm not trying to exclude SAH dads, I'm just speaking from my own experiences)I don't have the daycare worries. I don't have to fit in grocery shopping on a weekend. I almost never wear make up. But the expectations also increase.
With the house, there is an expectation it should be clean. Not really out of line...except I hate housework. I cook six nights a week. I don't mind cooking so much and hubby still helps with the dishes, some nights this is the only time we get to have adult conversation. But it is also expected that I will serve on every committee at my kids' school. It means that I should volunteer for team mom/coach/Girl Scout leader/classroom assistant because I have so much time. And most important, that time I get to spend with the children.
My kids are convenient like the ones on "Desperate Housewives." They are always there and constantly demanding something. They fight with each other and they defy me. It is a constant battle to get them to pick up after themselves. If I leave the room, the youngest one is into something. My fridge and pantry are locked. Somedays I have to lock all the rooms in the house just to keep her out of stuff. She's four going on fifteen and figures whatever trouble she gets into, it was probably worth it.
Anyway, enough of the sob story. Parenthood is rough no matter what the circumstances. But people are incensed by the idea of putting a monetary number in relation to parenthood. The value of raising our children and mantaining a loving home defies mere salary. Which is exactly the point and why like to see this kind of validation. It isn't that we think we deserve money or financial compensation and I can tell you, I don't do enough to earn $100K. I just want to do enough to justify my online shopping habits.
Parents who stay at home are either praised as selfless beings devoted to their families, taking satisfaction in the pure joy their nurturing brings. Or they are seen as mindless zombies content to spend their days watching purient televsion munching on Doritos and bon bons. Neither one is true of course, but it does point to one thing: the loss of identity.
My biggest adjustment was my loss of identity as a person. From 8-5 Monday through Friday I was me. Now, there are days where I never hear my name. I am a mother then a wife and that is the extent of it. I do it myself. I allow it.
I think when a parent sees a breakdown of what the value of their services would be in the working world, it makes them appreciate themselves. As mothers, whether you work outside the home or stay at home, we need to appreciate ourselves. We need to appreciate our strengths rather than focusing on our failures.
No one is going to do that for us. Our spouse who spends the day working isn't going to understand how difficult our day is. Our kids aren't going to care. We can only hope they have children of their own and then they will understand.
Look at what you do every day and appreciate the skills it takes to do what you do. Go use the salary wizardand see how much you really do and how tough it really is. Understand how valuable you really are. If you treat yourself like a valued employee, everyone else will to. If not, go on strike.
Subscribe to:
Posts (Atom)